Before I read A Beginner’s Guide to Dying by Simon Boas, I remember feeling conflicted. I had no doubt that it would be an important book and one that I needed to read, but I wasn’t sure I was strong enough to read. I needn’t have feared. Despite Simon writing this book from the perspective of someone who is facing their death, it isn’t grim or hard to read, if anything it’s the complete opposite. This is an uplifting book full of wisdom.
As someone who has dealt with cancer twice, I only wished that I had been as brave as Simon. His humour and joy for life leaps off the page. How he found the strength to write this when he was facing his own death, I don’t know. But this little book is a gift to us all and one that needs to be treasured.
Simon Boas was diagnosed with Stage 4 throat cancer after a year of being told that he just had acid reflux. You might expect him to harbour some bitterness or express some self-pity, but instead he celebrates his life.
He reflects on the incredible life he has lived and shows how accepting death can offer peace and clarity. This is a book that really highlights how important it is to live fully in the moment. Here is a man appreciating the pure beauty of the everyday.
Simon talks about his experiences of meditation, psychedelics and contemplates the possibility of there being some form of god as a way of exploring forgiveness and finding peace. Admittedly, this might not be for everyone, but I implore you to read it as there is still so much wisdom in these chapters.
This book is an ode to joy. He reminds us how lucky we are to have even walked earth in the first place, how we beat the odds by even existing. He is funny and self-deprecating and gives offers insights that are comforting but also meaningful and constructive.
I am coming at it from the perspective of someone who has dealt with a life-threatening illness and I found it profoundly moving. His chapters on counselling have made me rethink my stance on it and it’s something I now realise I probably need to explore again. I also love his optimism and how he talks about finding the good in everyone and our capacity for kindness.
Despite the gravity of the subject matter, this was not a hard book to read. In fact, I read it in under a day and I’ve no doubt that it will be a book I return to again and again. There is also a really useful and practical chapter on how to support someone who is dying with advice like listen (properly), don’t skirt around the issue and don’t minimise things, being some of the many useful tips.
Despite its title. this isn’t really a book about dying, it’s about living, but I guess that’s the point. How can we ever truly live until we acknowledge one day we will die.
This is a book for all of us and one that we can all learn from. Simon lived an extraordinary life and he left us this extraordinary gift.
A must read.
If you would like a copy of the book you can order it here from The Bookish Magpie at bookshop.org
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